Reader Response: Crush, Don't Pursue

April 21, 2016




"Okay so I think this guy in my ******* class is really really cute, and could possibly be someone I really wanna date. My best friend told him that I thought he was cute and interesting and that I was single, he said he was single too, and she told him my name and everything. I already know his btw lol so that was last Friday, Monday and Wednesday (MWF class) I haven't said hi to him yet, idk what to do. I'm so scary and crazy shy especially with guys because I've only had one genuine relationship, which he interacted first. Like now I don't know how to just start talking to him. I've literally been crushing on this man since February. I gotta do something." - anonymous 



So the old me would have said to say hi or jus something small then let him do the rest. But I've really learned a lot from my boyfriend in the last three/four months. If a man really genuinly wants you, he will do what it takes to have you. That man knows you're interested in him. If he isn't making a move you don't want him (most likely.) Why? He's either not interested or he's waiting for you to make a move. Either way that isn't the way it's sposed to work. NOW, I will say tht I am speaking based on a biblical term. A man is supposed to pursue a woman for himself. Why? The bible doesn't require a woman to love her husband and working to get and keep someone goes hand in hand with loving them. That is required of the man. So if you are not ready/looking for a serious relationship, my advice may not apply to you. All in all, I say don't waste your time chasing a man or trying to build the relationship on your own because thts how the entire relationship will be: you struggling to keep the relationship going by yourself. That's not how God intended romantic relationships to run. Been there, done that. It's not worth the struggle and pain.


(Disclaimer: by no means do I mean that both parties should not be active in building and keeping a relationship. A man is supposed to lead, though, and I believe that in everything, including a romantic sense.)


Call to Action

I already know there will probably be some heated or passionate feedback on this one. Its a sensitive topic. I'm fine with that! Tell me what you think. What advice would you give this reader?  Can't wait to read your answers. 



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February 27, 2017

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